My dear February,
You're a funny little month, aren't you? Always a bit of a tricker with your fickle number of days (can we ladies propose to our fellas this year or not? Yes? Yes!).
You're the toughest of the summer months, having a stronger constitution than all-party-no-discipline December, what with his boozy Christmas breakups, puerile muck-up days and wanton schoolies week. And don't talk to me about that slovenly January, with her too-busy-with-my-New-Year-hangover and you-kids-don't-go-too-far-while-Mummy-works-on-her-tan haziness.